Nobody warned me that my dog would fart so much… ?

The above was a photo posted on Clovers Instagram Page back in 2020. Nearly three years on and things are no different. It was cute when she was a puppy… now it’s rancid. Maybe it’s because she’s a Frenchie, who are renowned for being a bit smelly, that she stinks the whole house out. Maybe its the ridiculously expensive, veterinary approved dog food that I give her. Or maybe it’s the treats. Who knows.

But it’s not just the house…I have also had car journeys with Clover in the back of the car where the stench is so bad that I’ve nearly had to pull over. Seriously. Opening the windows somehow makes it worse, it’s too cold for air con and so suffering in silence is the only option. It’s perfect throughout long journeys and the 3 hour drive that we do every few months are my favourite…

At home, my once stench free evenings are now replaced with a soft ‘puff’ type noise and then I’m faced with a choice… make a break for it and get out of the room, or stay where I am and wallow in it. I’ve asked the vet- she said its normal. Clover has a sensitive tummy like most Frenchie’s, so if she eats something slightly out of the ordinary it sets off her little gas machine. We have sensitive tummy treats and the veterinary approved food mentioned above- not that either of them help. I’ll still continue to pay stupid prices for both.

The worst thing is, Clover isn’t even remotely embarrassed by her smelly actions. She now sits on the landing whilst I work from my office and rips them out so loudly that I can hear them from three doors down… and then the smell comes. I’ve had to pause calls with clients to get up and quickly shut the door because I hear the fatal sound from down the hallway and know it’s only a matter of seconds before I can’t breath because of the smell.

My mum’s dog used to do it and then be so surprised by his own actions that he would turn round in shock, put his ears back and then run out the room in embarrassment. Not Clover. I think she does it on purpose. It’s like she has a long list of ways to annoy me and works her way through it throughout the day… she is always successful.

I kid you not, Clover is sat on my lap farting right now as I write this. Some days are worse than others. Tonight is particularly bad, which is what has prompted me to write this. Clover’s farts are relentless. But then, so is my love for her. So I put up with the smell and I keep buying the sensitive tummy treats and we live together in our small, smelly, happy bubble. In our own ruff reality.

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